COPING WITH EMOTIONS DURING RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS: ANGER
Posted: under Arthritis.
Why shouldn’t you be angry? You probably have found it necessary to give up activities that you truly enjoy. Your days are more difficult and complicated than they used to be. It seems that no one really understands the pain and frustration you’re experiencing. You’re frustrated with your doctor because your recovery is not as speedy as you would like it to be. These thoughts are all valid, and they would leave anyone feeling angry. People respond to anger in any one of several ways -and in different ways at different times. They may direct their anger inward, for example; people often blame themselves for their situation and suffer feelings of guilt as a result. Or they may direct their anger toward other people. Sometimes anger is suppressed entirely. Bottled up anger raises blood pressure, increases muscle tension and pain, and drains precious energy reserves.
Some people are angry and don’t know it. Their anger is so well disguised that they fail to recognize it. Each of the following thoughts, or self-messages, contains a disguised element of anger:
“I’m just going to finish this project at my own pace, and if he doesn’t like it, that’s his problem.” “Why would I want to go golfing, anyway?” “What does she know about arthritis?” “He’s just helping me because he feels guilty.” “I’m just not going to take that worthless pill.” “I should have stopped smoking and exercised more often.”
People who make self-statements such as these are angry about their arthritic condition and the havoc it is creating in their lives. One of the dangers of unrecognized anger is that it is often turned against other people, in the form of casting blame, harboring resentment, or engaging in passive-aggressive behavior. This response hurts people who really care about you and only want to help you.
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